Thursday, May 18, 2006

Dear Ronald-

I'm sorry, but our relationship is over.


You used to be THERE for me! I mean.. I know we haven't seen each other in a while, but we had this agreement... and yesterday.... you broke it. You left me... and no action whatsoever. I mean... I have NEEDS, you know!


You're just not worth the aches and pains if I'm not getting what I truly need out things... and I'm sorry, but you really let me down.


NO MORE will I go to you when I need you. NO MORE will I proudly exclaim how good you are behind closed doors. I have been let down, and I just can't continue with this masochistic behavior if I'm the only one holding up my end of the deal.


From now on... when I need to take a good healthy shit... I'm going to Bojangles.


It's over, Ronald. over.


no longer yours,
Carrie

12 comments:

novaks8 said...

ahh
we bypassed MD's for Boj today.

Real chicken!

Kelli said...

HAHA! Hilarious.
But I am sorry it did end up making you sick yesterday. Yuck.

just susie said...

Ah Good Old Golden Arches. Roto-router for the digestive system.

Jenni said...

oh, sorry it made you sick, Carrie!! Thank GOD it doesn't have that effect on me, b/c that's my version of "eating out" most weeks!! :-)

Carrie said...

dude... I guess I didn't clarify enough...

I *DIDN'T* get the shits!!!

I've been needing to take a good crap for like a WEEK now, and all I get are little unsatisfying rabbit turds!!! It's pissing me off!!!


I expected the runs from Mc D's... and alas... nothing. still stopped up.

I might have to start eating HEALTHY!! *shudder*

Elvis said...

Thou needest the all powerful and mighty work from the Castle.

All hail the White Castle.
Slide away... slide away...

And it's healthy!

greekchickie said...

Dude. You are NOT gonna believe THIS! I'm on a business trip as we speak & I just got to the hotel... I'm sitting here eating a cheeseburger from Ronald's place! LOL

M~

Laina said...

LMAO, I just blogged about a good ole colon cleansing today!! Here's a hint...it's meat like substance even less organic than what Ronald serves up. ;)

bridget said...

LOL! I just gotta love a girl who'll blog about poo! Or I guess I should say lack of poo. ;)

momxtwo said...

We had MD for supper last night. It was tasty and worth every pound I gained.

Go trans fat! (just kidding)

Hänni said...

Prune juice Carrie.

All you need is some prune juice ... and a bathroom in close proximity.

After the explosive experience is over you will probably curse the day you ever hit 'The Juice, but it'll be all good for your immediate *eh hem* needs.

Jewl said...

LMAO!! I can't believe it didn't work for you, it's almost a sure thing!! Go to Starbucks and slam a couple expressos... maybe that Chain might work a little better, LOL