Rhena Columbus

I'm thinking Rhena is somehow a kindred spirit to Columbus. Or was it Magellan? whoever wanted to prove the world wasn't flat.

either way.... somehow, their exploratory knack has transcended the time-space continuum, and my daughter is out to prove that the living room is not the only room in the house.

It's quite comical, really--- she does this roll, shimmy, roll roll, backwards skooch, then sits up. over and over again. If it wasn't so damn hot here, I'd put pants on her to prevent the rugburn she's getting on her poor little knees.


I'm seeing a floor-induced bump on her head in the very near future.

somebody asked me today if the house was baby-proofed yet. I'm assuming she meant if I had safety gadgets covering every square inch of the house, and was not asking if I've ripped my uterus out.


well the answer to both scenarios happens to be NO, so I was able to reply without skipping a beat. I mean.... sheee-it. I know I'm supposed to provide a safe environment, but where do you draw the line?


I'm all for picking up the broken beer bottles, wiping up the bleach spills, and not leaving mouse-traps out in the open and all.... but I've seen some people's houses, and all I can say is this.... YOUR CHILD IS NOT HOUDINI!!!!!

I mean, let's face it... there's some stuff that's necessary... lowering the water temperature... keeping chemicals in a locked cabinet... loaded guns are usually a no-no, too... well, at least depending on where you're from..... but the locks on the toilet lid, and the bumpers on the tables, and a lock on every damn cabinet in your kitchen.... ( Careful, Muffy!!! Biffy is going to get into the tupperware!!! E-gads!!!)

here's a hint. There's a little something called the word NO.

NO comes in many forms... verbal, physical, mental.... but after a while it does the trick.

My parents were tired of my brother going into the cabinets, so they did what any reasonable adult would do.... they played on his fear of alligators, and put a rubber one named Bobby in the cabinets. .....Ask how many times my brother kept going in the cabinets after that.....

of course... I could be talking out of my ass here.... who knows what I'll end up doing to keep Rhena and any possible future siblings in line. But seriously---- if I end up installing shit that even *I* can't open.... well... I can only hope one of you knows how to UN-install shit I can't open, and you help a girl out.