Tuesday, August 17, 2004

One is the loneliest number

well--- it's been a week of raspberry tea, uterine bribing, and subliminal downward rubbing on my belly hoping the monster will take the hint, but no luck.

I'm still big, and very much still carrying the extra load.

I would have posted sooner, but was too busy peeing every two seconds from all the extra tea.

ouch?I ALMOST thought we would have had something going this weekend--- the hip pains had gotten much worse, and I had a new pain to occupy my brain. this one was akin to a screwdriver being shoved up my crotch. every three to four hours.

Now, I know this sounds a bit harsh, and you're wondering how I would know about the screwdriver. Truth is, I wouldn't, so I'll say it was more like a dry tampon being ripped out of me, which indeed I HAVE experienced in my 20+ years of the joys of womanhood.

anyways--- long story short... I spent the majority of sunday in bed, thinking the laying down would help subside the pariah of pain that was going on inside of me. Come Monday morning, I was still feeling like a blindman's toolbelt, so I called the doc.

I was instructed to go to the hospital for monitoring... just in case.

well.... everything is just dandy. I can't say my hopes weren't up just a TEEEEEENY bit--- I mean... all the peeing from raspberry tea... the cramping--- maybe just maybe God DID want us to have a leo???

nope. Monster's perfectly comfortable where it's at.

The good news is that I did find out that what I WAS experiencing were actual contractions.... there's just not enough, and they're not synchronized with each other for this to be considered true labor. But hey--- at least if my cooch is going to feel violated every few hours, I know it's an eventually step to the final picture.

The other thing I found out is that I've started to dilate. again, I say this is good... cause it means we're heading in the right direction, right? bad news is I'm only 1cm. now, I can't remember if I've ranted about just how big 10 centimeters is, and the astonishing realization that my hole has to GET THAT BIG..... sweat, panic, fear!!!!

I digress.

I'm only 1/10th of the way there. comforting again, that I've finally begun, but being that there's no hard and fast rule to how long it TAKES said pregnant woman to get from point A to point B, and given the high propensity to get distracted very easily, I'm thinking it may be some time before I find myself pushing, or at the very least--- in drug land, which happens somewhere around 4-6 cm???

the other critical factor here is something I'm trying to not think about, which invariably cause me to think about it even more. the thing is this---- if ONE centimeter feels like a snap-on tool convention, what in hell is TEN centimeters going to feel like????

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