Thursday, December 15, 2005

Stupid WINTER

ok.... it's officially winter. Well.. not OFFICIALLY-OFFICIALLY... I mean, that doesn't come til Dec 21st... but man oh man... we've got some shit-ass weather over here.


today's forecast?

shit. cold, icy, rainy, SHIT.


I mean, I accept that winter indeed DOES have to make an appearance, but why oh why must I go from wearing t-shirts to this imposed ice cavern of doom-better-just-stay-inside-and-enjoy-the-day-of-darkness???? (I kid you not... December 4th had temps holding at 68 degrees around here, and today I question whether the sun really still exists....)


now I know some of you with your 100+ inches of snow may be reading this saying "sour grapes, Johnson!!! take your ice and shut the hell up!!!" but I got news for you... your 100+ inches of snow is why I DON'T live where you live!!!! SO take your 100+ inches of snow and stick it in the same place you're thankful you live near family, in a bustling metropolis, or in some ridonkulously low housing market. If you DON'T have one of those three to fall back on... I ask you.. what in HELLLLLL are you doing living where you do then??? seriously.... grey. winter. snow... ICK. move someplace warmer!!!


ok... so back to my shit-ass weather.... cause this blog IS about me, remember.....


it just FIGURES that today is the day I need to drive all over creation to pick up pictures and go food shopping etc etc etc. Cold weather and food shopping are NOT a budget-friendly combination for me. it's cold?? oh... ok!!! I'll just buy $50 worth of soups, $75 worth of bread, and damnit to all hell, you KNOW I'm gonna break the bank down that stupid BAKING AISLE.

so much for me losing weight by Christmas.... I mean.. let's face it. cold weather means no walks with boogie, and lots of "it's 9pm, so let's turn on the fireplace, make some coffee and stay up all night baking!!!"

but I'm getting smarter... or at least a little more generous with my weight gain.... now when I bake... I make deliveries to all of my neighbors so THEY can get fat, too. I mean... it's half the calories and half the fat if I make two loaves of apple bread and give one away, right????


......stupid winter....... stay warm, people!!!!!

10 comments:

Porq said...

COLD SUCKS!! Being the snake that I am, I like warm!!! If it gets too hot, you can always find an air conditioned bar!!

OINK

Unknown said...

I think giving it away negates ALL the fat. It's about good karma. I always foist my baked goodies off on the people here at work.

Tee/Tracy said...

LOL. If you want to make me fatter I can Email you my address ;) I love neighbors who come knocking with fresh cookies.

gina said...

yes we are having your weather today too, us just being an hour away. it does SUCK. i dont mind snow, its the freezing rain/ice on roads that annoys me!

yummmm apple bread? sounds good! have fun baking.

Susie said...

I'd rather have snow than icy rain any day. That stuff sucks because you get wet AND cold. But hells yeah about the stocking up for the winter. My chocometer went WAY up the past week. Pass the truffles.

Marianna said...

Girlie ~ don't even attempt a healthier eating habit around the holidays. You know we're destined to blow that idea right outa the sky.

I heard it's mighty cold down there... combined with the bad weather ~ YIKES!

Be careful, gal.

M~

Anonymous said...

i have to say the worst part about where you live ( and remember this is my home state we're talking about here) are the idiot drivers. first of all, when they heard it was going to storm they went and bought out the ENTIRE grocery store. because 12 rolls of toilet paper is just not enough. so they've already got everything they need by the time the storm hits and yet they insist on going and driving in it. they don't have to go to work because everything cancelled at the mere mention of the store. they have enough fruity pebbles to last until 2010. where are they driving?! and no, you can't just avoid the ice cause you can't see where it is. that's why it is called black ice-it looks just like the asphalt its on top of! argh. that's why i don't live there anymore and instead live in nyc, where our whole transit system may come to a crashing halt when the strike comes. wait a minute... i can't win!

Dottie said...

Yum, baked goodies. I haven't been in the baking spirit...wish I was your neighbor! :)
The cold just HURTS! I like for it to snow a little but not when it brings the biting cold and nasty ice.

Stay Warm!

CheekyMoo said...

I read this while wearing shorts. I just felt the need to let you know that. You love me, I know it.

Christi said...

I am not feeling the cold weather this year, either. Not liking it...one bit.